


Flesh Donut

by covetsubjugation



Series: The Infamous Story of 'The Squad' [17]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Gen, Multi, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-20
Updated: 2016-07-20
Packaged: 2018-07-25 16:03:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7539049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/covetsubjugation/pseuds/covetsubjugation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"<b>peggy</b><br/>i just found a page that gives 51 “christian-friendly words for butthole”????</p><p><b>angel</b><br/>why are you always the one who finds these kind of things</p><p><b>peggy</b><br/>if i knew i would let you know"</p><p>*<br/>Thomas Jefferson is inducted into The Squad. They're still a mess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flesh Donut

**Author's Note:**

> Guess who had three hours of sleep and is thisclose to crying.

**the angelica squad**  
_aaron burr, angel, ayyyymaria, baguette fucker, disney god, dosiaaa, eliza, fight me, get ur own dicc, jamesmadd, peggy_

_jamesmadd has added better than you to the group_

**fight me  
** didn’t we agree not to do this

 **jamesmadd**  
I AM SUFFERING  
YOU ALL SHALL TOO

 **better than you  
** AOECN990CNH03HDJJKR=XMIXOFHSMH`[0J SWGB1CH F0[ 1JX

 **angel  
** what the fuck

 **better than you  
** SHE SHE SHE

 **disney god  
** i’m scared

 **jamesmadd**  
HE HAS BEEN DOING THIS BLEEDING INCOHERENT THING FOR 10 FUCKING YEARS  
I CAN’T DEAL WITH HIM ON MY OWN

 **better than you**  
IT’S JUST  
NO  
NO  
NO  
NO

 **jamesmadd  
** HE HAS CALLED ME TWICE

 **fight me  
** and you thought having him in my presence would be a good idea?

 **peggy  
** thomas can you stop yelling

 **better than you  
** NO

 **eliza**  
it’s not that i’m not curious  
it’s just that you’re shouting  
and it is 9 in the morning

 **get ur own dicc  
** fucking spit it out already

 **jamesmadd  
** he’s crying

 **baguette fucker  
** take photos

 **disney god  
** i love laf’s pritorities

 **baguette fucker  
** like you wouldn’t do the same

 **disney god  
** tru

 **dosiaaa**  
but can jefferson explain now  
cause like i have class  
and i need time to kiss aaron before i go  
and i’m very curious

 **ayyyymaria**  
that????  
is????  
so????  
sweet????

 **fight me  
** ew kissing aaron burr

 **aaron burr  
** You have literally asked me on a date before

 **angel**  
no that was the other way around  
i have receipts guys pls

 **dosiaaa  
** POINT STILL STANDS ABOUT CURIOSITY

 **get ur own dicc  
** curiosity killed the cat

 **dosiaaa  
** @ **get ur own dicc** satisfaction brought it back your point?

 **eliza  
** oooooohhhhhhhh

 **fight me**  
john ily but you just got owned  
i wanna date theo now

 **aaron burr  
** No.

 **dosiaaa  
** @ **jamesmadd** is thomas still crying

 **jamesmadd  
** actually he told me what happened and i wanna start crying too

 **ayyyymaria  
** LITERALLY NOT HELPING THE CURIOSITY

 **better than you**  
MY GR ANDMA TEXTED ME  
SHE SA ID  
“IS BUKKAKE A REST AURANT”  
AND THEN THREE MINUTES LATER SHE C A L L E D  M E

 **fight me  
** NO

 **get ur own dicc  
** NO

 **baguette fucker  
** NON

 **disney god  
** OH MY GOD

 **angel  
** MY EYES

 **dosiaaa  
** what’s bukkake

 **aaron burr  
** NO  
@ **dosiaaa** N O

 **fight me  
** GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD FUCK THIS SHIT

*

 **Theodosia** <3  
 _online_

Um

Yes, I actually know what bukkake is, Aaron.  
And I was doing it to freak you out.

Okay.

*

 **baguette fucker  
** i miss the onesie party

 **angel  
** ngl same

 **baguette fucker  
**!!!can we have another!!!

 **disney god  
** babe you have a report due tomorrow

 **fight me  
** i’m on laf’s side

 **get ur own dicc**  
you slept for 3 hours last night  
p l e a s e go to bed

 **fight me  
** i feel fine??

 **eliza  
** @ **fight me** we had class together today you are not fine i could see you dying the whole time  
is he still doing the eye thing

 **disney god  
** yea

 **fight me**  
???  
what eye thing

 **aaron burr**  
They mean the thing where you are half asleep and you blink really slowly  
You do that especially when you don’t sleep for like 3 days

 **fight me  
** burr, are you showing concern for me???

 **dosiaaa  
** aaron, are you cheating on me???

 **angel  
** burr how could you

 **get ur own dicc  
** wait, the man has a heart???

 **baguette fucker  
** this is aSTOUNDING NEWS

 **peggy  
** WE MUST ALERT THE PRESS

 **ayyyymaria**  
BREAKING NEWS: MAN BREAKS GIRLFRIEND’S HEART AND YET SHOWS CONCERN FOR ENEMY

 **aaron burr  
** Why must you all gang up on me

*

 **baguette fucker  
** so onesie party?

 **disney god**  
YOU  
HAVE  
WORK

*

 **angel  
** school is hard

 **aaron burr  
** I agree

 **eliza  
** rt rt

 **fight me  
** school is fine

 **better than you  
** @ **fight me** when was the last time you ate/showered/slept

 **fight me**  
1) fuck you  
2) why are you still in the group  
did we not bother to kick him out

 **baguette fucker  
** i will kick the both of you out watch me

 **fight me  
** but you’re my boyfriend??????

 **baguette fucker  
** not if you keep fighting like children

 **better than you  
** @ **fight me** ooh daddy’s calling

 **jamesmadd  
** @ **better than you** i have receipts on you watch it

 **better than you  
** WHY ARE YOU NOT ON MY SIDE

 **angel  
** I NEED THOSE SEND THEM TO ME

 **better than you  
** THIS IS BLACKMAIL

 **fight me**  
that’s a good question  
are screenshots that were taken without the person’s knowledge or consent considered immoral

 **ayyyymaria  
** are you just hoping we will debate you and then prove that it isn’t so you can claim the moral high ground while getting receipts

 **fight me  
** @ **ayyyymaria** you know me so well  
@ **peggy** keep dating this one i like her

 **peggy**  
1) i don’t defer to you for everything  
2) i shall endeavour to

 **ayyyymaria  
** <3

 **peggy  
** <3

 **eliza  
** this is so cute

 **disney god  
** i want to give them a run for their money

 **peggy  
** this isn’t a competition?

 **disney god  
** that’s cause you’re winning

 **ayyyymaria  
** hell yeah we are

 **get ur own dicc  
** I’M GOING TO GO KISS HERC AND SEND ALL OF YOU A PICTURE SO THERE

 **baguette fucker  
** WAIT I WANT KISSES TOO

 **fight me  
** I’M AT WORK WHY

 **better than you  
** and yet still not contributing

 **fight me  
** YOU

 **jamesmadd  
** r e c e i p t s

 **better than you  
** …

*

 **peggy  
** i just found a page that gives 51 “christian-friendly words" for "butthole”????

 **angel**  
why are you always the one who finds these kind of things  
also why are you quoting it like that

 **peggy  
** if i knew i would let you know

 **eliza**  
why is my sister like this  
link?

 **peggy**  
<http://tysonbowersiii.com/51-christian-friendly-words-for-butthole/>  
i can’t believe you asked for a link

 **eliza  
** it could come in handy in the future

 **fight me  
** is one of the words “thomas jefferson”

 **get ur own dicc**  
1) that’s technically a phrase  
2) can u nOT

 **better than you  
** go fuck yourself hamilton

 **fight me**  
go fuck your homosexual’s harpoon target  
your winking brownie door  
your grandmother’s syrup volcano  
your flesh donut  
your thomas jefferson

 **baguette fucker  
** lord give me strength

*

 **get ur own dicc  
** i managed to gag alex

 **disney god  
** maybe he will stay quiet for once

 **baguette fucker**  
unlikely but we can hope  
what did you use

 **get ur own dicc  
** what do you think

 **angel  
** guys

 **get ur own dicc  
** sHIT WRONG GROUP

 **aaron burr**  
Did I need to know that?  
Did I?

 **better than you**  
what did you use tho  
just for future reference  
for work and stuff

 **jamesmadd**  
sure  
“for work and stuff”  
sure jan

 **better than you  
** QUIT DRAGGING ME

 **jamesmadd**  
i am literally your ex-boyfriend  
i have Receipts

 **fight me**  
WAIT  
YOU GUYS WERE DATING?????

 **angel  
** weren’t you gagged

 **fight me  
** yeah but they didn’t bind my handssdvfowqufv

 **get ur own dicc**  
sorry problem resolved  
bye

*

 **better than you  
** It’s 1 am and I can’t stop thinking about myself.

 **fight me**  
number one  
you realise this is the gc right  
number two  
stop quoting kanye west

 **get ur own dicc  
** #1 problematic person: kanye west

 **ayyyymaria  
** idk i think hitler still wins

 **eliza  
** technically stalin killed more people than hitler

 **dosiaaa**  
must you guys ruin the joke  
also sHHH I HAVE WORK TOMORROW

 **fight me  
** if i come down there and study can i get a discount on the drinks

 **aaron burr**  
No  
I’m studying there

 **fight me**  
let me rephrase  
can i get a discount if i promise not to disturb your boyfriend

 **dosiaaa**  
tbh i rather you disturb him because it’s funny  
but he’s also yelling over our private chat  
so yes

 **aaron burr  
** You weren’t supposed to tell him that

 **dosiaaa  
** welp too late

 **fight me**  
why are we not discussing thomas jefferson’s ego  
and why are not discussing his relationship with Madison

 **angel  
** because frankly alex your ego is equally as big

 **fight me  
** AM NOT

 **angel  
** and also we already knew about the relationship

 **fight me  
** and you didn’t tell me?????

 **baguette fucker  
** to be fair you weren’t friends with the schuyler sisters then

 **fight me  
** @ **disney god** @ **get ur own dicc** @ **baguette fucker** did you know?

 **disney god  
** can’t we discuss this in the morning

 **fight me**  
…  
technically yes  
but no

 **disney god  
** i’m just gonna sleep

 **get ur own dicc  
** ditto night

 **baguette fucker**  
bonne nuit

**fight me  
…**

**disney god  
** you can join if you leave your phone outside

 **fight me  
**...

 **disney god**  
finE i promise to tell you in the morning  
now come to bed

 **fight me**  
the things i do for love  
good night guys

 **angel  
** holy shit alex is actually going to sleep

*

 **eliza  
** the group is so quiet

 **peggy  
** why are you awake

 **eliza**  
homework  
why are you awake

 **ayyyymaria  
** hi

 **eliza**  
o H  
don’t you have work tomorrow

 **ayyyymaria**  
yes  
i’m going to regret this so hard tomorrow  
$10 say I will drink more of the product than sell it

 **angel  
** i’ll take it

 **ayyyymaria  
** why are you awake?

 **dosiaaa  
** hi

 **ayyyymaria  
** WHAT

 **angel**  
NO WAIT HOLD ON  
WE WERE JUST TALKING  
BECAUSE ELIZA LEFT THE LIGHT ON TO STUDY  
AND WE CAN’T REALLY SLEEP WITH THE LIGHT ON

 **eliza  
** SORRY

 **ayyyymaria**  
oh  
that makes a lot more sense

 **dosiaaa  
** the group is so quiet when it’s just us

 **angel**  
ikr  
i can’t believe everyone is asleep

 **eliza**  
what a rarity  
it should be treasured by us  
a time just for us girls

 **fight me  
** i’m still awake

 **angel  
** FOR FUCK'S SAKE GO TO BED

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter notes!  
> The bukkake joke, the butthole joke, and the kanye west joke came from [here](http://damncampbellshit.tumblr.com/post/147677178036/bisexualexhamilton), [here](http://tysonbowersiii.com/51-christian-friendly-words-for-butthole/) and [here](http://bisexualexhamilton.tumblr.com/post/147639094109) respectively.
> 
> Announcements!  
> So I would like to thank you all for your interest in the hamilton gc! I know up until now I've been saying that we will be adding more members into the gc, however, without going into too much detail, we hit an issue that made me realise that adding in new members may not be the best idea. Therefore, we are closing applications for the hamilton gc. However, we will be starting up something else instead, for those who didn't make it into the gc. It should be up and running soon (???), so watch this space for more announcements.
> 
> Alternatively, you can also create your own hamilton gc! That's fine by me (i don't have a monopoly on it and jazz) and may you have better luck running the gc than I do!
> 
> If you would like to yell at me about the gc, feel free to do so at my [tumblr](http://bisexualexhamilton.tumblr.com). I accept full responsibility for any raised hopes and the like.
> 
> Alternatively if you like to say something nice about the fic, my tumblr is still [here](http://bisexualexhamilton.tumblr.com).
> 
> Please leave kudos and comments, if you enjoyed today's fic! They really brighten up my day.
> 
> See you!


End file.
